28 February, 2010

Bully Stick Continued

OK, the last time we chatted Swoosh had buried his Bully Stick that I bought him to save it for later.  Well, guess what?!  He got it out yesterday and started chewing it!  Yes!  I've actually found something he likes to chew on.   Who would've ever guessed it would be a bull's penis?  Not me that's for sure.  Anyway, I decided to sneak out and get the laundry out of the dryer while Swoosh's eyes were rolling back in his head from his Bully Stick bliss.  I returned to find a large piece of his tooth on the floor.  I thought oh no what have I done?  All I wanted to do was help him get his teeth cleaned and instead he loses one.  I called the vet and they advised me to bring him in to take a look.

After the vet and his assistant (2 dudes)  finished laughing at me for not knowing what a bully stick was ("Clever marketing" was what the assistant said) the doc told me that it wasn't actually a tooth but a big chunk of tartar.  The bully stick did it's job! Gooo beef pizzle!

24 February, 2010

Bully Stick

OK, there's been an uproar on my earlier tweet about buying my dog a certain something to chew on so here's the scoop. I ventured out to the Petco today to pick up some food for my Jack Russell and I wanted to get him something to chew on. He doesn't like to chew stuff which makes it very difficult to keep his teeth cleaned. The vet actually put him under to clean his teeth a few years ago but he's 13 now and the breath is pretty stank. So, I turned to the trusty 20-something Petco employee with tracks shaved in the side of his head to guide me on something to get my boy chewing. I figured a guy with tracks in his head should know about gnawing on stuff. Sure enough he did and was totally geeked out about it.

He offered me a Bully Stick saying "I've never had any complaints about 'em, they're all natural and they taste good." Then he added, "It's just a bull's penis; that's all it is. It's very chewy." Wait, what? So, I put the 6 incher in my basket and paid the cashier. Swoosh hasn't chewed it yet but he buried it in his blankets which means he likes it and will check it out later.

The only info I've found on the bully stick so far is that it's all natural and made from cattle. If anyone knows the real deal about the bully stick (if it truly is what the dude said it is) please write in and enlighten us all.

16 February, 2010

Bean and Cheese Burrito

Well, I'm off to have a bean and cheese burrito with someone special. They're obviously special if 1) I will eat a bloated bean and cheese burrito in front of them and 2) I will stick around after it's digested. All this while watching the Olympics. Yay! Go amazingly fit athletes from the world.

11 February, 2010

15 year old douchebag

So there's a certain 15 yr old kid that I want to punch in the ribs.  He's one of those doctor's kids who know Daddy will pay for anything so they feel like they can disrespect other people and their belongings.  So here's the scoop - my sister who is awesome by the way got me a nice cordless mic for Christmas.  It was her way of saying "hey at first I didn't know about all this stand up stuff but now I think it's awesome so I'm gonna get you this freakin' sweet cordless mic to show my support so you can run a room and rock it out."  She totally talks like that btw.  So I asked the producers of the show if we could use my mic in the show tonight knowing everyone would use it.  Now mind you I am well aware that comics can abuse the hell out of a mic but most comics are respectful of one another and if they know it's your stuff they will take care of it.

Enter 15 yr old douchebag who decides to beat my mic senseless against the stand repeatedly until I finally had to yell out "hey, hey, hey" to make him stop.  So to all the 15 yr old douchebags out there, when you turn 18 and have to start paying for shit, I'm gonna come over and beat you senseless right about the time your parent's health insurance plan drops your ass.  Bleh!

07 February, 2010

Oscar Buzzed

So, still trying to figure out why we've gone to 10 Best Picture nominations at the Oscars.  I understand the whole "Oh, hey let's get more viewers by nominating a movie they've actually seen."  But come on let's be honest, these pictures won't win.  Then the "more" viewers will just be jaded and not watch ever again.  Then the Academy will pull an NBC and go back to 5 noms next year or even worse - Jay Leno as host. Granted, I will still dress up and play Oscar bingo but I will NOT, I repeat, I will NOT eat the cocktail weenies.

Hey btw, got a show this week.  Check it out...

02 February, 2010

Mailing List

Hey everybody!  Join my mailing list on my  Website .  Just go to my welcome page and click on the "Contact" tab.  You'll enter your info there.  My newsletters will keep you updated on my upcoming shows  and special interests and/or recommendations for the world of comedy/acting/improv/voice over.  See you soon!

01 February, 2010

"I Hate Mondays"

So, if you hate Mondays as bad as Garfield then this is the movie for you.  "I Hate Mondays" is a 3-D feature length comedy written and produced by a dude named Farrin.  That's right, 3-D.  'Cuz why not hate Mondays in 3-D?   We do it in 4-D every freakin' day!  So, go to the "I Hate Mondays" Facebook page and become a fan!  I dare ya...